Hey Em, how’s it going up there?
I miss you more then anything, it hasn’t gotten easier just worse…
Your dad has been arrested babe. Finally. Your mom is keeping the house and she’s decided to keep everything in your room the same, but she asked me if I wanted anything of yours to help.
I was going through your “Memories With Izz :D” box and I found your journals. I spent the entire day crying my eyes out. Joe seems so fucked up without you babe. Fuck everyone’s so fucked without you.
I realized how much you really loved him, the way you talked about him, what you wrote… if you just held on for a little longer… God Em, this really is fucked.
I have no reason to wake up, but I’m holding on for a little just to save others and help others. I know I won’t be here much longer, and I cannot wait.
Well I’ll see you soon.
I love you EmEm <3
” To Izzy:
I’m sorry for every ache, tear, and worry I’ve caused you.
I’m sorry for every disappointment I’ve made.
I’m sorry for all my imperfections.
I’m sorry for failing you and myself.
I’m sorry for never living up to your expectations.
I’m sorry for never telling you what was going through my mind.
I’m sorry for never telling you my internal battles.
I’m sorry for never having the courage to stand up for myself.
I’m sorry for never trying to speak.
I’m sorry for never letting you in at all.
I’m sorry for keeping you awake at night.
I’m sorry for never telling you how much you meant to me.
I’m sorry Izzy.
To my dad:
Dad, I’m sorry for never being the daughter you wanted.
I’m sorry for whatever it is that made you not love me.
I’m sorry for being a disappointment.
Dad I am sorry…. and even though it’ll never matter to you, I do love you…
Handsome, what can I say? You were always there and you had a plan to save me. You were going to be my knight, and save me from this hell. But I took the selfish way out. You’re gunna think this is your fault because we sort of lost contact, but it’s not. It’s completely my choice. I wanted it. Which is why I did warn you. You would of made me think twice, I couldn’t do it. I wrote this whole letter without crying until now. Hah, I’m such a baby. Joey, I wouldn’t of made you as happy as I wanted to. Your heart wasn’t meant to be mine, you’re to pure for me. I love you so much. You’re everything a girl needs and wants. You’ll find that girl who’ll be your equal. She’ll never be good enough for you in my mind though… Your mom is missing out. You’re wonderful, smart, handsome, caring, and funny, she’s going to regret this love. I know it says people who commit suicide won’t be going to heaven, but if by some chance I do, I’ll always be looking out for my Joey. I wish I could of gave you a hug and see you smile, but I’ll just have to picture it. Joey, you think you’re all flaws, but you couldn’t be more perfect. You have no flaws to me sweety. You’ll make a wonderful husband and father one day. I wish I could see it all, maybe I’ll be able to look down, who knows. Anways I love you Joe, so much. I wish you the best in life, and I’m sorry…
Emberlynn Carter. “
Emberlynn died at two fourteen am June 1st, 2012.
This is her cousin Izzy, I found this looking through her laptop. I thought I should post this…
A few friends, Emberlynn’s brothers, and I are going to make a foundation for kids/teenagers like Emberlynn. Information will be given asap.
But all above? Not true love.